Today is August 25, 2008. Four years ago Alex was killed in Najaf, Iraq at approximately 10:35 a.m. e.s.t. We learned of his death about four hours later.
Today is also Carlos' 48th birthday. He was born in 1960 in San Jose, Costa Rica in the kitchen of his home. I'm not surprised his Mom couldn't get to the hospital on time. Carlos is always in a rush to this day. It's who he is.
Carlos has been trying to call his Mom all day. Actually, he tried calling her yesterday but the phone has been busy. It's almost 9 p.m. now and the phonecall still doesn't go through.
Brian called today. He's upset. Today is a hard day. I love that kid so much and don't know what to do either does Carlos. We both know that Brian is now an adult at 21 and that he is the only one who can take charge of his life. There's no owner's manual on being parent to a young adult with complicated issues. It's not an easy spectator sport.
There were many people today who called to remember either Carlos' birthday or Alex's death day. Our friend Cindy in Florida put together a blog entry and posted it to daily Kos. http://www.dailykos.com/story/2008/8/24/11743/4558/591/574032 A lot of people have responded to it. God bless Cindy...
I've called Sarah twice today to ask about the dogs. I walk around the house and there's no doggie who gets between my legs and follows me around the house. Those pups fill a void in me. My two step sons came into my life at eight (almost nine) and six. Alex was laid back. Brian was devious and always running around. I didn't have baby years with them. I love to see their baby pictures and hear stories about their antics.
My Chica I've had since she was a puppy. She is the one I've raised since her birth. I feel that connection and so does she. Buddy was adopted when he was two. He is my boy.
I wish that I had a magic wand to make my Alex and Brian little kids again so I could share those years with them. That's not how it works though. I mourn Alex's death and remember his life. His spirit and legacy creates new memories for both his dad and me. Brian's angst and young adult hood also brings new challenges to us both as people who love him. I pray for Brian a lot. Please Lord, keep my Brian well, healthy and safe.
Today, Carlos ran around like a chicken with his head cut off preparing the memorial for the long ride to Minneapolis. We leave early tomorrow morning.
It's now 9:04 p.m. Soon we go to sleep. We want to watch Kennedy at the DNC but fatigue may get the better of us.
Tomorrow, we drive to Cleveland, Ohio. We get to see my friend Joyce who we haven't seen for over eleven years. Cleveland is the half way mark to Minneapolis.
The truck is ready and waiting for our a.m. departure....I hope that we will be too....
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